Work has been waking me up early in the mornings and it has been difficult to go back to sleep. With only 2 1/2 weeks left, there is still so much to do. I don’t feel anxious, I just see all that I need to get done. This morning I sorted out that I will work long days through the end of the week, work Sunday for part of the day, and not push anything in bulk to the last week which is already short because of Memorial Day. I will come in 1-2 days after Steve & my vacation week to wrap things up with the new HR person, but then I plan to be done.
After I had sorted all that out it felt good to stop and come back to my breath, come back to my self. I am finding real benefit from two practices: 1) coming back to my breath and my body in this moment and letting what is be; and 2) surrounding myself with love.
What I am able to see is that the emotions, feelings, body reactions are Real. I can accept them more with awareness than with judgment.
And the stories that pour forth from those states of mind are just mind chatter. I do not have to identify with them or follow them to any wound up conclusion. With that awareness they lose their steam and wind down pretty quickly.
Then, during a quiet time like in meditation or early morning, the deeper feelings that drive those reactions have space to make themselves known. It is then that there is understanding and freedom and healing.